novelSusiti Chapter 23 A Math Lesson at the Foot of Yinshan Mountain
Chapter 23 A Math Lesson at the Foot of Yinshan Mountain
On the southern slopes of Yinshan Mountain, the north wind blows like a knife.
This is the natural dividing line between agriculture and nomadic life, and it was also the front line of the confrontation between the Qin Empire and the Xiongnu at this time.
Unlike the tense atmosphere of the past, with swords drawn and war drums thundering, the Qin army's vanguard camp today exuded a strange academic air.
In a sheltered mountain hollow, three thousand heavily armored cavalrymen, as imposing as iron towers, sat in a circle. They were not sharpening their swords or feeding their horses; instead, each held a twig and stared blankly at the strange scribblings drawn on the sand before them.
Standing in the middle was Han Xin, dressed in an ill-fitting, oversized Confucian robe (to appear cultured) and holding a teaching whip.
"Listen up, all of you!" Han Xin tapped a blackboard (a wooden board blackened with charcoal by Zhao Gao) next to him, his voice high-pitched yet exuding an unquestionable authority.
"Today we're not talking about how to chop someone up; that's what butchers do. We're talking about math."
The heavy cavalrymen below exchanged bewildered glances. They were burly men handpicked by Xiang Yu from the Chu region, each one broad-shouldered and thick-waisted, their minds filled with nothing but muscle. Asking them to kill was one thing, asking them to count was another; it was worse than killing them.
"Staff Officer Han," a centurion couldn't help but raise his hand and ask in a gruff voice, "we're here to fight a war. What's the use of learning this damn arithmetic? Does being unable to count make my sword less sharp?"
A burst of laughter erupted around them.
Sitting in the front row, Xiang Yu was idly toying with his eighty-pound ring-pommel sword, his face full of impatience. If it weren't for Ying Zheng's strict order before his departure, requiring him to listen to Han Xin's "pre-battle lesson," he would have already drawn his sword and rushed out to kill a few Xiongnu scouts to pass the time.
Han Xin coldly surveyed the entire room, pushing up his non-existent glasses.
"Good question."
Han Xin turned around and drew a circle and an arrow on the blackboard.
"This is a head. This is your knife."
"Let's say your horse's speed is ten meters per second, and your sword weighs eight pounds. When you stand up using the stirrups and leverage your waist and abdomen, the speed at which you swing the sword is fifteen meters per second."
"So, how much kinetic energy was generated the moment the blade touched the Xiongnu man's neck?"
The entire hall was completely silent. The centurion stared wide-eyed, feeling as if he were listening to gibberish.
"It's a force strong enough to cut through three layers of leather armor and a cervical vertebra." Han Xin asked himself, answering his own question with a fanatical gaze. "That's physics. That's mathematics."
"But!" Han Xin changed his tone abruptly, slamming his pointer hard on the blackboard.
"If you pursue the enemy for more than five li because you are greedy for merit, your horse's speed will drop to six meters per second. At this time, the speed of the Hun's counter-attack arrows will be fifty meters per second."
"According to probability theory, the probability of your faceplate being hit by a shot will increase from one in a thousand to five percent. And your sword, because it's not fast enough, won't be able to cut through the opponent's leather armor."
"The result is—" Han Xin drew a big X on the blackboard.
"You're dead. Because you're stupid. Because you can't do math."
Xiang Yu finally couldn't listen anymore. He stood up abruptly, his black chainmail with beast heads clashing against the ground with a dull metallic clang.
"Han Xin, you talk too much nonsense." Xiang Yu's eyes burned with fighting spirit. "The battlefield changes in an instant; there's no time for you to calculate this! A true strongman reduces all probabilities to zero!"
"As long as I charge fast enough, their arrows won't be able to catch me!"
Han Xin looked at the humanoid tyrannosaurus and sighed helplessly.
"Commander Xiang, His Majesty said this is a 'dimensional reduction attack.' We are fighting with industry and mathematics, not with your brute force."
"Report—!"
A scout rolled into the circle, interrupting the tense lesson.
"Chief of Staff Han! General Xiang! Urgent report from Black Ice Guard! The Left Wise King of the Xiongnu, leading 20,000 elite cavalry, has entered the area 30 li north of 'Black Wind Pass'! They are approaching our flank!"
Xiang Yu's eyes lit up, and the long sword in his hand suddenly vibrated, emitting a buzzing sound.
"They're here!"
"Twenty thousand against three thousand?" Xiang Yu's lips curled into a cruel smile, the excitement of a hunter seeing his prey. "Han Xin, your math class is over. Now, it's time for gym class."
Han Xin, however, remained completely calm. He took out the thick account book from his robes, flipped through a few pages, and then looked up at the sky.
"Teacher G said that there will be a northwest wind today, with a force of level four. It's suitable for setting fires, but not for shooting arrows."
"Commander Xiang," Han Xin pointed to a canyon on the map, "don't rush in. Let that old rogue Liu Bang finish his act first."
……
North of Heifeng Pass lies the Xiongnu camp.
The Left Wise King was sitting on his horse, holding an exquisite glass wine bottle in his hand, his face flushed.
"Fine wine! Truly fine wine!" The Left Wise King let out a burp, the strong smell of alcohol wafting from two miles away. "That senile old Qin Emperor actually sent such potent wine! Much stronger than horse piss!"
The surrounding Xiongnu cavalrymen were also staggering about, holding "Mendao Lv" (a type of strong liquor) specially supplied by the Shaofu (a government office) and drinking to their hearts' content.
In their view, this southward journey was merely for tourism and purchasing goods. The main force of the Qin army was still building roads, leaving only the elderly, weak, and disabled on the border.
"Your Majesty, there's a Qin caravan ahead!" A centurion galloped up, a greedy grin on his face. "Their wagon broke down, and they're repairing it by the roadside! It's full of good stuff!"
"Oh?" The Left Wise King's eyes lit up. "Rob them! Kill the man, take the woman!"
Not far away, Liu Bang was sitting next to a large cart with its axle deliberately broken, holding a roujiamo (Chinese hamburger) in his hand, eating and cursing.
"Fan Kuai! You idiot! I told you to loosen the axle a bit, not to break it! Now look what's happened, it really can't move!"
Fan Kuai looked aggrieved: "Brother, I was just trying to make my acting more convincing."
Seeing the approaching Xiongnu cavalry, Liu Bang did not flee. Instead, he stood up, straightened his ill-fitting silk robe, and put on his signature, mercenary, and obsequious smile.
"Your Majesties! Don't attack! Don't attack! I am a law-abiding citizen! A truly law-abiding citizen!"
Liu Bang raised his hands and pointed to the convoy behind him.
"These are all gifts for our esteemed kings! There's the finest silk, and... and that 'Shu Yunrou'!"
The Left Wise King rode up to him and looked down at the fat man with a beaming smile.
"Are you from Qin?"
"Yes, yes, yes! I am a merchant from Xianyang. I heard that all of you kings have arrived, so I came here specifically to... to do business." Liu Bang pulled out a piece of Qin paper from his sleeve, on which was drawn a list of various goods. "As long as Your Majesty doesn't kill me, all these things are yours! I will send them to you every month from now on!"
The Left Wise King laughed heartily and lashed Liu Bang's feet with his whip.
"The Qin people are spineless!"
He waved his hand: "Men! Move it! Move it all!"
The Xiongnu soldiers cheered and rushed toward the caravan. They tore open the tarpaulin and found it indeed filled with silk, wine jars, and even several boxes of glittering glass marbles.
"We've struck it rich!"
However, what they didn't notice was that beneath those carts of "good wine" lay rows of black earthenware jars. These jars didn't contain wine, but rather kerosene.
Moreover, Liu Bang secretly smeared a special powder on the list he handed to the Left Wise King.
That was the powdered version of "powerful laxative" provided by Little G (of course, it was called "croton oil" in this era).
"Brother, shall we retreat?" Fan Kuai looked at the ferocious Huns, his palms sweating.
"Withdraw?" Liu Bang glanced at the sky. It was noon, the sun was blinding, but the northwest wind was strong.
"No rush." Liu Bang squinted at the Xiongnu people who were drinking heavily in the carriages. "Let the bullets fly a little longer."
"We'll run after they've drunk enough and finished their business."
"At that time..." Liu Bang glanced in the direction of the distant mountain valley, "Xiang the Madman should have come out by then."
……
Half an hour later.
The combined effects of alcohol and croton oil began to appear.
The once high morale of the Xiongnu army suddenly turned strange. Many soldiers clutched their stomachs, their faces pale, and swayed unsteadily on their horses.
"This wine...it's getting a bit strong?" The Left Wise King felt dizzy, as if his intestines were knotted. "The Qin people...poisoned it?"
Just then, the earth began to shake.
Thump. Thump. Thump.
At first, it was very faint, like a distant heartbeat. But in an instant, the sound became muffled and dense, like muffled thunder rolling across the ground.
"What's that sound?" The Left Wise King struggled to his feet and drew his scimitar.
A black line appeared on the horizon.
The black line quickly thickened and grew larger, eventually transforming into a moving steel wall.
Three thousand heavy cavalry.
Men and horses were clad in full armor. The black iron armor reflected a chilling light in the sunlight, like a ghostly army from hell.
White vapor billowed from the nostrils of every warhorse, and every knight wore a ferocious bronze mask.
The leader was twelve feet tall (an exaggeration), holding a long sword as big as a door panel, with red feathers dancing wildly in the wind behind him.
"What kind of monster is that?" The Hun soldiers stared in horror.
They had seen Qin soldiers and chariots, but they had never seen anything like this that encased horses and people in iron cans.
"Fire arrows! Fire arrows now!" the Left Wise King roared.
A sparse hail of arrows flew over.
"Jingle bells!"
Bone arrows, which could normally pierce leather armor, were like toothpicks hitting a stone when they struck those heavy iron armors; they bounced off without even leaving a mark.
"It's no use...it's no use?!"
Five hundred steps away.
Xiang Yu sat on his horse, feeling the stable sense of unity between man and horse. The stirrups beneath his feet gave him boundless confidence.
He took a deep breath, his last breath before the killing.
"The entire army—!"
Xiang Yu raised his sword, his voice booming like thunder.
"Crush them!"
"kill--!!"
Three thousand cavalrymen accelerated simultaneously.
In the past, cavalry charges required a gradual increase in speed. But with the high-bridged saddle and stirrups, knights could urge their horses on without restraint, even standing up on their backs and pressing their entire weight forward.
Speed. Power. Mass.
Han Xin's physics formula became a reality at this moment.
One hundred steps away.
The Xiongnu cavalry finally reacted and attempted to charge into battle.
But their proud light cavalry were like eggs hitting a rock in front of these steel monsters.
"boom--!!"
The two armies clashed.
There was no stalemate, no protracted struggle.
Only broken.
Xiang Yu took the lead, his eighty-pound longsword sweeping out with the speed of his horse.
"puff!"
The three Xiongnu cavalrymen in front of him were cut in two by this one strike, along with their horses! Blood and entrails exploded in the air, like blooming crimson fireworks.
Xiang Yu didn't need to use a second move at all. He simply held his long sword horizontally and, with the help of his warhorse's momentum, pushed his way through.
Wherever it went, people and horses fell over, and severed limbs flew everywhere.
The three thousand iron-clad cavalry behind them, like three thousand meat grinders, pierced into the loose formation of the Xiongnu.
"This is impossible! This is impossible!" The Left Wise King was terrified as he watched his elite troops being harvested like wheat.
His scimitar struck the enemy's armor, producing only a string of sparks, but instead cracking the web between his thumb and forefinger. The enemy, in turn, swung a hammer (some heavy cavalrymen were equipped with maces), smashing the top of his head.
This is the generational gap in equipment.
This is a case of dimensional reduction attack.
"Run! Run!" The Left Wise King turned his horse around, trying to escape this hellish scene.
But he realized he couldn't escape.
Because his stomach... was in so much pain. Under the stimulation of extreme fear, the effects of the croton oil finally kicked in.
"puff--"
On horseback, the Left Wise King lost not only his dignity but also his strength.
……
On the hillside, Han Xin calmly watched this scene through his binoculars.
He held the abacus in his hand, his fingers moving rapidly.
"Xiang Yu's charging speed was twelve meters per second, while the enemy's collapse speed was eight meters per second..."
"Enemy troops are retreating from the northwest at a 30-degree angle."
"There is a canyon five miles from here."
Han Xin closed his abacus and said to the messenger behind him:
"Send word to General Meng Tian's light cavalry (although they lack stirrups, they are sufficient for pursuing and eliminating the remaining enemy forces)."
"Go to the northwest and block the breach in 'Fallen Eagle Gorge'."
"Tell them not to rush to kill. As long as they keep their bags tightly shut, none of these diarrhea-stricken Huns will escape."
The messenger, watching the one-sided massacre, swallowed hard and looked at the thin scholar with awe.
"promise!"
……
The battle ended faster than expected.
Half an hour later.
Only groans and the neighing of warhorses remained on the battlefield. Of the 20,000 elite Xiongnu cavalry, most had been killed, and the rest knelt on the ground, trembling.
Xiang Yu, mounted on his horse, was covered in blood, looking like a demon just pulled from a pool of blood. His armor was covered in bits of flesh, and his long sword was dulled.
But he showed no signs of fatigue; on the contrary, he was in a state of extreme excitement.
"That was exhilarating! That was exhilarating!" Xiang Yu roared to the sky. "Now this is what war is all about! Now this is what killing is all about!"
He looked at the prisoners kneeling on the ground, his eyes still filled with murderous intent.
"Kill them all! Build a mound of corpses!" Xiang Yu raised his sword.
In his view, keeping these barbarians around was a waste of food, so it was better to kill them all and deter the grasslands.
"Wait!"
A voice came from behind. Han Xin rode over slowly on a gentle little mare.
"Commander Xiang, spare his life!"
Xiang Yu frowned, his fierce gaze hardening: "What? Han Xin, you want to teach me how to deal with prisoners? On this battlefield, I call the shots!"
"You're in charge on the battlefield, but after the war, I'm in charge." Han Xin took out a piece of Qin paper from his pocket, stamped with Ying Zheng's jade seal.
"His Majesty's edict."
Xiang Yu snorted coldly, but he could only put down his sword.
Han Xin pointed at the prisoners, pushed up his glasses, and began to settle accounts.
"Commander Xiang, do you know how much a strong laborer is worth on the Qin black market?"
Five thousand coins.
"There are eight thousand prisoners here. That's forty million coins."
"Forty million coins, how many black beans could you buy? How many miles of straight road could you build? How many sets of new armor could you get for your three thousand brothers?"
Han Xin looked at Xiang Yu as if he were looking at a spendthrift son.
"When you slash someone down, you're not cutting off a head, you're cutting off money."
"Moreover," Han Xin pointed to Liu Bang, who was cleaning up the battlefield in the distance, "His Majesty said that these people are the best materials for road construction. They are strong, eat little (just give them some silage), and don't need to be paid wages."
"If we kill them, who will mine? Who will build the Great Wall? Are you suggesting we send your Ironclad Cavalry to lay bricks?"
Xiang Yu was stunned.
He looked at the Xiongnu people who had been so hideous just moments before, but now, under the sound of Han Xin's abacus, they had transformed into walking "gold ingots".
This logic of "exploitation is worse than killing" was quite impactful for Xiang Yu, who revered military force.
"Hmph!" Xiang Yu sheathed his sword. "You're ruthless. These two-legged sheep are yours."
"However," Xiang Yu pointed to the Left Wise King in the distance, who was bound hand and foot and wailing incessantly (because of stomach pain).
"The leader's head is mine. I'm taking it back to His Majesty... to exchange for wine."
……
The battle report was carried by carrier pigeons, flying swiftly back to Xianyang along the straight cement road.
Xianyang Palace, Qilin Hall.
Ying Zheng looked at the victory report in his hand, but his face did not show much expression.
"Twenty thousand to three thousand, a complete victory."
"12,000 were beheaded and 8,000 were captured. Our own casualties were... 58 (mainly injuries from falling from horses)."
This is a terrifying casualty ratio.
Below the court, the officials were completely silent. They knew that Qin was powerful, but they never imagined it would be this powerful.
"Congratulations, Your Majesty! Congratulations, Your Majesty!" Li Si was the first to react. "This is a blessing from Heaven for Great Qin! With the Iron Pagoda unleashed, who in the world can rival us!"
Ying Zheng waved his hand.
"It's not divine favor. It's the result of 'investigating things'."
He stood up, walked to the map, and planted the black flag representing the Qin Dynasty firmly on Yinshan Mountain.
"Little G," Ying Zheng thought to himself.
"In this battle, I not only defeated the Xiongnu, but also woke myself up."
Why does Your Majesty say this?
"In the past, I thought that unifying the world relied on having a large population and being ruthless."
"Now I understand. The unification of the world relied on what you called... 'productivity'."
"When my steel is harder than theirs, my horses are faster than theirs, and my arithmetic is better than theirs."
"What can they use to fight me?"
Ying Zheng turned around, his gaze passing over the assembled officials and landing on a more distant place.
"Send the order to Meng Tian."
"There's no need to rush back to the capital."
"Have Han Xin lead those prisoners to build a city on the spot. I want to build a 'Surrender City' at the foot of Yinshan Mountain."
"Furthermore," a sly glint flashed in Ying Zheng's eyes, "print the news of this great victory on the front page of the *Great Qin Daily*. Also, depict that 'invulnerable' armor on it."
"I want to show those old nobles in the six kingdoms who still want to restore their rule a good lesson."
"Even the Xiongnu couldn't cut through my armor, those rusty bronze swords they hid in their cellars..."
"Can it still be cut?"